Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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