belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
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