idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Randomize
