oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
