So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Enjoy the penises
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
