The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
