I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
