# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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