i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
im on a boat
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