Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
