he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
They left me at home... I'm a liability