i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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