Texts From Last Night

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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.

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  (336): If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule. http://tfl.nu/wdvp
  Replies (27) Good night (3496) Bad night (506)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)

  (1-407): View more from Florida

  Mom wtf!?

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  (407): Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :) (1-407): Mom wtf!? http://tfl.nu/scw1
  Replies (33) Good night (5953) Bad night (1004)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.

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  (330): Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley. http://tfl.nu/14i4
  Replies (16) Good night (1117) Bad night (5118)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  it's circumsized.

  (954): View more from Florida

  I think this conversation is over.

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  (904): it's circumsized. (954): I think this conversation is over. http://tfl.nu/jc3y
  Replies (44) Good night (1162) Bad night (5024)
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  (716): View more from New York

  i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly

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  (716): i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly http://tfl.nu/a8cm
  Replies (19) Good night (1355) Bad night (5463)
• Favorite

  (951): View more from California

  I didn't know people actually cried after sex.

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  (951): I didn't know people actually cried after sex. http://tfl.nu/mss1
  Replies (25) Good night (998) Bad night (7358)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.

  (1-337): View more from Louisiana

  so you admit it was good then??

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  (337): if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600. (1-337): so you admit it was good then?? http://tfl.nu/xl9i
  Replies (27) Good night (8607) Bad night (987)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome

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  (208): When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome http://tfl.nu/r1ky
  Replies (17) Good night (3801) Bad night (1679)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack

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  (541): ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack http://tfl.nu/jnxf
  Replies (7) Good night (877) Bad night (1405)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.

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  (732): She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type. http://tfl.nu/2pbk
  Replies (6) Good night (1512) Bad night (697)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.

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  (281): Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons. http://tfl.nu/y27y
  Replies (6) Good night (3144) Bad night (628)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?

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  (401): Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen? http://tfl.nu/0v6w
  Replies (5) Good night (2369) Bad night (475)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.

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  (202): He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight. http://tfl.nu/npw7
  Replies (14) Good night (446) Bad night (716)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!

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  (406): That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face! http://tfl.nu/7j4j
  Replies (2) Good night (203) Bad night (393)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.

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  (520): dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first. http://tfl.nu/2u4z
  Replies (32) Good night (284) Bad night (1138)

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