No, you can still breathe under the balls.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize