I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
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