Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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