he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
