Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
