there was a trapeze. enough said
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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