Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize