talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
