hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
