i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
