3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
