The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
My life is pants optional.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Your penis caused this!
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