Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
