I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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