I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
