you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
