You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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