erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
