i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
