I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Randomize