she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
