kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
My ass is underappreciated
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
