I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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