Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
