I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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