apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
You know, be my cock's hype man.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
