He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
