Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Randomize
