I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
