You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
