That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize