just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
My vagina just clenched in fear
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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