We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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