watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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