is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
