my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize