I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
