The brown eye won't let me do that either.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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