Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize